Loved this letter - so true. And such a coincidece I was thinking about just this today as I went for a walk.
Normally I wear headphones and listen to a podcast, but today I decided not and got chatting briefly to a lovely older couple who were listening to the bird songs and told me what some of them were.
Sometimes I find if I let myself be alone with me in the moment these kind of casual interactions happen more, and I'm learning to really appreciate them now I'm on my own, they often make me smile! Xx
I get goosebumps everytime you write. It’s like a message from the universe, a sign I’m on the right path. I’m alone atm in ibiza. Volunteering on a retreat. Staying in a hut on the side of a hill, with nothing but the bare essentials. I have a few hours a day in community, painting, helping out and being in alignment with other nomads from Italy, France and Spain. But the most part I’m alone. And for someone with an anxious / avoidant attachment its a pretty big thing. I love your words, your relatable story and the sense of belonging I feel in your community xx yes I am alone yet feel less so than I did towards the end of my marriage or when I’m with my family and friends . This journey of self discovery is a tricky one but because of you and your courage I feel hopeful xxx thank you xx much love xx Louise x
Great post, Thank You. My entire life I've always felt guilty and as if there was something wrong with me for preferring to be alone most of the time. Never have liked crowds or groups of people and definitely an introvert. The other problem was being overwhelmed by the emotions and "noise" coming from others. Not too long ago I learned what being an empath was defined as. Solitude provides the quiet I need and crave.
Jessica, as always your writing is spot on. It manages to be both soothing and yet challenging. Nudging the reader ever so slightly out of their comfort zone. It gave me pause for thought and motivation to change some things. I cannot wait for your next book.
Couldn't be without alone time. However I think I do struggle to actually be alone (I.e..hello scrolling!). I'm living alone (with kids 50:50 right now) and it's the dream I had years ago and is what I imagined. No one to answer to or judge what I'm doing. I've had horrible times sharing with partners, friends, randoms, even family.
I was so surprised when your marriage ended as I mostly forget that social media is a highlight reel and I struggle to imagine the difficulties behind the scenes if the external image is positive.
"I’ve also found the more you value you the more others will too and the more authentic and nourishing your connections will be." This is such a true statement that I had to stop and re-read it and let it sink in. I have come to realise this as I get older; it really starts and ends with us, and we need to treat ourselves the way we expect and deserve to be treated by others. Great piece : )
I love this. We so, so need to learn to be alone, and I think our society doesn't really teach us how to do it. But it is so life-changing and life-enhancing when we learnt to be alone, learn to love and bask in our own company, learn to take on big challenges like moving to new countries alone 🥰
Reading this I remembered the moment I found myself falling in love with my husband. I was alone for many years before that and developed quite a good relationship with myself and an enjoyment of my own company. I found it absolutely terrifying when we met. I was so scared of the possibility that I'd never be okay on my own again. I now have two small children as well so my life feels so intertwined with others. Time with myself is a rare luxury/necessity. I'm left wondering, would I still be okay on my own? I think I would, but still, it makes me wonder.
I am at a state where I’m swamped by duty and relationships of dependency. The situation is just the opposite yet the same need for loving myself, knowing the truth about myself, embracing it wholly and enjoying the process of self-discovery while living a life for others is so important now! This was a lovely piece as you can see it can appeal to a wide range of situations and people! Thank you for this open letter ! And enjoy Paris !
I’ve had to spend a lot of this year dealing with very difficult things alone and it’s made me realise I am stronger than I thought and that I can provide support for myself. I’m grateful for this lesson even though I would never wish for the situation I’m in. When I can I’m hoping to try travelling solo even though the thought still scares me!
Oh so true, IV been alone all of my life,sadly IV found that all humans do is hurt you! My love for animals far exceeds my love for humans,animals have never hurt me,and they love you unconditionally!
IV learned there is only one person you can really rely on in life and that's yourself!!!
I can be who I want, do what I want, and don't have to answer to anybody!
Anyone in an unhealthy relationship should get out of it!
I enjoy being around my friends and family but there comes a point that I need to leave and recharge my batteries alone. Even so, it has taken me the last 3 years to feel somewhat comfortable at being alone. For the most part I am happy being alone and to experience my life in the world solo. With that being said, I still have moments where I'm unable to be still in my own company. I still have some work to day within myself for me to be full present and comfortable being alone.
Silence and Solitude are the air I breathe. It's absolutely essential for my mental health to have plenty of them in my daily life.
Hi Jessica,
Loved this letter - so true. And such a coincidece I was thinking about just this today as I went for a walk.
Normally I wear headphones and listen to a podcast, but today I decided not and got chatting briefly to a lovely older couple who were listening to the bird songs and told me what some of them were.
Sometimes I find if I let myself be alone with me in the moment these kind of casual interactions happen more, and I'm learning to really appreciate them now I'm on my own, they often make me smile! Xx
I get goosebumps everytime you write. It’s like a message from the universe, a sign I’m on the right path. I’m alone atm in ibiza. Volunteering on a retreat. Staying in a hut on the side of a hill, with nothing but the bare essentials. I have a few hours a day in community, painting, helping out and being in alignment with other nomads from Italy, France and Spain. But the most part I’m alone. And for someone with an anxious / avoidant attachment its a pretty big thing. I love your words, your relatable story and the sense of belonging I feel in your community xx yes I am alone yet feel less so than I did towards the end of my marriage or when I’m with my family and friends . This journey of self discovery is a tricky one but because of you and your courage I feel hopeful xxx thank you xx much love xx Louise x
Great post, Thank You. My entire life I've always felt guilty and as if there was something wrong with me for preferring to be alone most of the time. Never have liked crowds or groups of people and definitely an introvert. The other problem was being overwhelmed by the emotions and "noise" coming from others. Not too long ago I learned what being an empath was defined as. Solitude provides the quiet I need and crave.
Jessica, as always your writing is spot on. It manages to be both soothing and yet challenging. Nudging the reader ever so slightly out of their comfort zone. It gave me pause for thought and motivation to change some things. I cannot wait for your next book.
Couldn't be without alone time. However I think I do struggle to actually be alone (I.e..hello scrolling!). I'm living alone (with kids 50:50 right now) and it's the dream I had years ago and is what I imagined. No one to answer to or judge what I'm doing. I've had horrible times sharing with partners, friends, randoms, even family.
I was so surprised when your marriage ended as I mostly forget that social media is a highlight reel and I struggle to imagine the difficulties behind the scenes if the external image is positive.
"I’ve also found the more you value you the more others will too and the more authentic and nourishing your connections will be." This is such a true statement that I had to stop and re-read it and let it sink in. I have come to realise this as I get older; it really starts and ends with us, and we need to treat ourselves the way we expect and deserve to be treated by others. Great piece : )
I love this. We so, so need to learn to be alone, and I think our society doesn't really teach us how to do it. But it is so life-changing and life-enhancing when we learnt to be alone, learn to love and bask in our own company, learn to take on big challenges like moving to new countries alone 🥰
Reading this I remembered the moment I found myself falling in love with my husband. I was alone for many years before that and developed quite a good relationship with myself and an enjoyment of my own company. I found it absolutely terrifying when we met. I was so scared of the possibility that I'd never be okay on my own again. I now have two small children as well so my life feels so intertwined with others. Time with myself is a rare luxury/necessity. I'm left wondering, would I still be okay on my own? I think I would, but still, it makes me wonder.
I am at a state where I’m swamped by duty and relationships of dependency. The situation is just the opposite yet the same need for loving myself, knowing the truth about myself, embracing it wholly and enjoying the process of self-discovery while living a life for others is so important now! This was a lovely piece as you can see it can appeal to a wide range of situations and people! Thank you for this open letter ! And enjoy Paris !
I’ve had to spend a lot of this year dealing with very difficult things alone and it’s made me realise I am stronger than I thought and that I can provide support for myself. I’m grateful for this lesson even though I would never wish for the situation I’m in. When I can I’m hoping to try travelling solo even though the thought still scares me!
Oh so true, IV been alone all of my life,sadly IV found that all humans do is hurt you! My love for animals far exceeds my love for humans,animals have never hurt me,and they love you unconditionally!
IV learned there is only one person you can really rely on in life and that's yourself!!!
I can be who I want, do what I want, and don't have to answer to anybody!
Anyone in an unhealthy relationship should get out of it!
Lovely to read this Jessica. I find peace in being along but I also find peace in unexpected moments where I’m not.
Stillness is a practise for me and one I’m ever so curious about.
I enjoy being around my friends and family but there comes a point that I need to leave and recharge my batteries alone. Even so, it has taken me the last 3 years to feel somewhat comfortable at being alone. For the most part I am happy being alone and to experience my life in the world solo. With that being said, I still have moments where I'm unable to be still in my own company. I still have some work to day within myself for me to be full present and comfortable being alone.
I loved your style of having a voiceover!!! WOW! Lovely post.
I loved your style of having a voiceover!!! WOW! Lovely post.