When we put the pressure on is when we tend to crack
Happy belated birthday! I love this idea of celebrating ourselves. Something I love is fresh flowers. I often send them to others to say thankyou, happy birthday or get well soon, or just to let someone know I'm thinking of them. But no-one ever sends me flowers. So I've decided I'm going to order myself some and celebrate myself for a change. Thankyou for the prompt xx
This is very honest and reflective, Jessica and a lot of it resonates. As a single mum, I definitely know the value of self-celebrating, doubly important so I don’t place the weight of my expectations (and potentially disappointment) on my young daughter’s shoulders. I treat me well! 😂🙌🏻 And Blue Horses is absolutely beautiful 💙
Nothing much to add but wow this picture above is so beautiful and soothing :) It was a great listen x
I admire the work that you are doing on your self, I am also doing the work but I’m much older. (My daughter is the same age as you)
I resonate with so much you say around birthdays and celebrating yourself, I felt this year was different for me, i let go. We share the same birthday. I love following you x
first of all, I want to say thank you! For your work, for your way of working yourself through the challenges of life and for letting me participate in your point of view.
Secondly, I hope you smile the way I did, looking at this last picture you have send with your letter. I do not know if you are aware it contains a beautiful little heart just in the wall outside your window.
So interesting to read this because I wrote a Substack post about the exact same thing at Christmas time - though I haven't published it yet as I've been quizzing people for a few months now about how they celebrate themselves/how they feel celebratory. It baffled me for so long, I hated my birthday or any achievement that would usually be celebrated. Even growing I felt the same, I skipped my school and Uni graduation, I never celebrated exams or my birthday, I found New Year to be a chore. But I've been slowly finding ways to celebrate myself and testing the waters bit by bit. Lovely to read about your journey around the same thing.
Happy Birthday, Jessica! You look gorgeous on the photo! Thanks for your nice words!
I used to hide on my birthday, ever since my 40th birthday (my husband died 2 weeks later). He was at the hospital those days and I didn’t spend any time with him because of all the invitations I got. The next day I found him in a coma. I felt guilty for celebrating. On my 50th I decided I was going on a trip to see the humpback whales in the pacific. I had to cancel that trip because my dad (80 years old) was falsely accused of something and put in jail. He is out now because there was only proof of his innocence. But all this to say that I am kind of afraid of my birthday’s Hahha.
Hi Jessica 🌻 This post has been in my mind on and off, and I have listened to it a few times too. I wholeheartedly agree with what you say, but whenever I have tried to reflect on how I could celebrate myself on my birthday (or any other celebratory event in my life), I have come up short. I don't know how to do that. I don't know what I actually like in relation to celebrating. Breaking the norm of what celebrating means is so much harder if you don't know what you want. And how to answer people when they ask questions like: "what did you do on your birthday?" ... Oh, it feels complicated.
"shifting the expectations onto myself"
This is hard to do for sure. My birthday is coming up later this month and I'm putting my thinking hat on to how I want to spend the day. Thanks for the nudge.