On days when you need grounding
Simple, free and effective ways to calm your nervous system whilst reconnecting to yourself
Hello you!
I’m not feeling good today. I don’t feel strong, adventurous or even positive. I feel weak. I feel sad. I feel scared. I feel a little hopeless too. Do you know those days? Do you have them as well?
It’s one of those days when I don’t know what I’m doing. I spent the entire evening waiting for someone to text me but they never did. We’d arranged to see one another and they were supposed to let me know when they were done at work. I got ready. I dried my hair, curled it and put on my make up. I chose and outfit. I put it on. I took it off. I put it back on again. The waiting became painful.
Eventually I swallowed my pride and text them. They called me. They told me they’d fallen asleep on their sofa and asked if we could do tomorrow. I said ok. The stories I’d made up in my head during the silence were more than enough to activate my nervous system and send me into a spin.
The smallest things can trigger our wounds. When they’re triggered so is our nervous system and the rollercoaster sets off. Waiting for them last night did not feel good. The uncertainty, the hoping, the stories that began to unfold. If you do this too you’ll know exactly how it goes.
This morning I feel shot. I feel like I want to hide away.
My costar horoscope is telling me to do the things that ground me today and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. These are the last things I naturally feel I want to do but what I know from experience will actually help. I wanted to share my list with you should you ever find yourself in a similar situation.
Mediate - helps us to step out of our thinking, out of our minds and into our bodies. I always know how triggered I am during meditation because of how much my body will wriggle and how difficult I find it to sit still. Afterwards I always feel better. There is no minimum amount of meditation that’s good for us which I really like. Sometimes I’ll do 2 minutes, most often I do 5 and sometimes I’ll do 10. I always use an app like Aura or Headspace for a guide as I find I get lost otherwise. There are good free Youtube videos available too.
Yoga - is a sure way to process trauma in my experience. Moving my body always feels good, even when it’s the last thing I think will make a difference. When I feel stressed or anxious or overwhelmed I often feel like all I want to do is lie down and hide away under my duvet. There are times for this of course but I make sure I move my body first, even if it’s just a five minute yoga video.
Journal - to channel thoughts out of my body. Processing thoughts rationally isn’t a strength of mine. They swirl around in my head growing arms and legs yet making no sense. Sometimes I think I know what I’m thinking and how I’m feeling but when it comes to articulating this to others I have no idea and it comes out as nonsense. Writing out my thoughts and feelings organises them, gets them out of my body and I’m left feeling relieved, lighter, clearer. Grounded.
Read - helps us focus on something other than our overthinking. For me, reading takes me away into a different world. There’s something meditative about reading that soothes me. It’s hard to find the concentration span to do it when I’m feeling anxious or stressed but even just reading one page helps me to feel more grounded.
Walking - like yoga I find walking helps to process negative energy and emotions. I once read the reason we shake is to process adrenaline out of our bodies and it makes a lot of sense then why walking does the same - because it’s movement. Ideally this walk will be in nature as this is proven to help reduce stress for us where as those who walk down city streets don’t feel the same benefits. When I lived in the Peak District it was easy to walk in nature but now I have to make a little more effort and head to my local park.
Connection - being able to speak to a friend who isn’t going to try and fix me or judge me but just will instead sit and listen is a privilege I feel lucky to have. Showing what feels like our weakness is hard but always worth it because connecting with others is how we feel less alone.
They’re simple. They’re free and they work. Meditation clears ours mind and slows down the thinking. Yoga processes trauma. Journaling helps us channel our inner self outwardly and walking processes the adrenaline.
What about you? What grounds you? Do you find it easy to lean into those things when you need them most or is this when they feel most out of reach?
Lots of love
Jessica xxx
Well, I took delivery of a lovely book yesterday called “Enough” written by a most wise woman. So reading I suppose. 📖
I love all of those suggestions Jessica, reading is my favourite. I did this today and sat outside in the sun that has appeared for a couple of days. I felt calmer straight away, it's such a calming activity for me too.